Maybe I'm Drunk
I've had close to a bottle of wine. No, not a magnum, nor a box, just a regular ol' bottle o'wine. I'm on the last glass. It's only 9:30 on Friday. Is that wrong?
My thoughts are running rampant, they're all over the place. This is part of the reason I suspect I might be drunk. The fact that I am not misspelling has nothing to do w/ the spell check, I don't use that device, but again, the fact that I'm not misspelling has nothing to do w/ being sober, as I am also a good drunk driver, so don't base your judgement on my grammar and I won't either. I think maybe I am drunk.
Ok, just now I spilled wine all down my sweater and also on the couch. It's white, so no big whoop, but this could be a further indication that I am drunk. The larger question is "Am I a drunk?" No-one in my immediate family (consisting of two parents and eight siblings) is a drunk. However, my father's siblings, of Eastern European descent are... well, they drink. My mother's father... he was Scotch-Irish. He died when I was about two feet tall (I remember the wake.) All I know is I found some of his whiskey in my Grandma's basement and claimed it. I still have some. Old shit. Was he a drunk? I know little about him. I remember a story of him being so sunburnt that he had to crawl on the floor. My mother had anorexia at age 21. That was 56 years ago. These things seem relevant.
I think the structure, cadence, and flow of this entry may answer the question about me being a drunk, maybe, but maybe I'm just saying that bc I have no idea what I'm saying, and I just assume it sounds fucked up when perhaps it doesn't really. I never in a million years fancied myself as such, a drunk. But lately, the quantifiable evidence seems to suggest that perhaps I might be. I'm not asserting with certainty that I am - who in their right mind would want to do such a thing - it's just... I guess I'd rather not be. A drunk. Christ, I know so many. And they do bad things. And I don't want to do bad things.
Please don't tell me I'm a friend of Bill W.
My thoughts are running rampant, they're all over the place. This is part of the reason I suspect I might be drunk. The fact that I am not misspelling has nothing to do w/ the spell check, I don't use that device, but again, the fact that I'm not misspelling has nothing to do w/ being sober, as I am also a good drunk driver, so don't base your judgement on my grammar and I won't either. I think maybe I am drunk.
Ok, just now I spilled wine all down my sweater and also on the couch. It's white, so no big whoop, but this could be a further indication that I am drunk. The larger question is "Am I a drunk?" No-one in my immediate family (consisting of two parents and eight siblings) is a drunk. However, my father's siblings, of Eastern European descent are... well, they drink. My mother's father... he was Scotch-Irish. He died when I was about two feet tall (I remember the wake.) All I know is I found some of his whiskey in my Grandma's basement and claimed it. I still have some. Old shit. Was he a drunk? I know little about him. I remember a story of him being so sunburnt that he had to crawl on the floor. My mother had anorexia at age 21. That was 56 years ago. These things seem relevant.
I think the structure, cadence, and flow of this entry may answer the question about me being a drunk, maybe, but maybe I'm just saying that bc I have no idea what I'm saying, and I just assume it sounds fucked up when perhaps it doesn't really. I never in a million years fancied myself as such, a drunk. But lately, the quantifiable evidence seems to suggest that perhaps I might be. I'm not asserting with certainty that I am - who in their right mind would want to do such a thing - it's just... I guess I'd rather not be. A drunk. Christ, I know so many. And they do bad things. And I don't want to do bad things.
Please don't tell me I'm a friend of Bill W.
posted by Black Egg at 9:36 PM
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