Other Related Duties
Tonight at work I had to spend over two hours removing fecal matter from a variety of surfaces at one of our clients apartments. I was thankfully assisted by another staffer (yes, TWO of us over there for TWO HOURS) Perhaps my fellow staff/shit-cleaner-upper said it best: "I've lived 52 years and I've never seen anything like that."
If I say it was bad, and I say it was "everywhere" and that the bathroom looked like a shit-bomb had exploded in there, you might come up with an image. Take that image, and multiply it times 10. Really. It was unfuckingbelievable.
I guess, in a situation like that, some other faculty takes over, and you just deal with it. I'm going to leave out the disgusting details. But know that we had to throw out, in double-bagged trash bags - towels, bathroom rugs, a mop, a scrub brush, blankets and sheets, clothing, a, um, ladle. Fuck, you don't want to know why the ladle got involved. Trust. You don't. It's a distinct possibility that tomorrow the entire sofa will be out by the dumpster. Tonight, it's still in the apt., covered in giant trash bags.
Really, really, this isn't what my job is supposed to be about. We interact with our clients, just usually not quite so - intimately. The extent of the mess makes little to no sense to me. We were about as Hazmat-ed out as you could get under the circumstances. I'm still going to take a shower before bed.
I have nothing to drink here tonight except a scant shot of Baileys, which I sipped at and is now gone. I think by nothing I mean no beer. There's one bottle of wine. There's a bit of gramp's whiskey. I still have this smell in my nose. I'm worried it will give me bad dreams. Maybe tonight I'll use Vicks just for kicks. Mmmmyah that and the whiskey. Death to the deadly particulate trapped in my sinuses!
If I say it was bad, and I say it was "everywhere" and that the bathroom looked like a shit-bomb had exploded in there, you might come up with an image. Take that image, and multiply it times 10. Really. It was unfuckingbelievable.
I guess, in a situation like that, some other faculty takes over, and you just deal with it. I'm going to leave out the disgusting details. But know that we had to throw out, in double-bagged trash bags - towels, bathroom rugs, a mop, a scrub brush, blankets and sheets, clothing, a, um, ladle. Fuck, you don't want to know why the ladle got involved. Trust. You don't. It's a distinct possibility that tomorrow the entire sofa will be out by the dumpster. Tonight, it's still in the apt., covered in giant trash bags.
Really, really, this isn't what my job is supposed to be about. We interact with our clients, just usually not quite so - intimately. The extent of the mess makes little to no sense to me. We were about as Hazmat-ed out as you could get under the circumstances. I'm still going to take a shower before bed.
I have nothing to drink here tonight except a scant shot of Baileys, which I sipped at and is now gone. I think by nothing I mean no beer. There's one bottle of wine. There's a bit of gramp's whiskey. I still have this smell in my nose. I'm worried it will give me bad dreams. Maybe tonight I'll use Vicks just for kicks. Mmmmyah that and the whiskey. Death to the deadly particulate trapped in my sinuses!
posted by Black Egg at 12:32 AM
2 Comments:
oh lordy- the worst i've seen yet was a woman who evacuated her bowels while in the ambulance. they just loaded her on the table in the ER and ran. she was covered in her own shit. we had everything bagged up (can't throw out a patient's personal belongings!) and then we had to go BACK into the bags to get....a sample. there was plenty to choose from!
I think dealing with, uh, shit like that builds character.
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